Valkyrie

“Open your eyes.”

I can’t. My body feels off. Unresponsive. But the pressure of fingers against my eyes is still clear. I can feel someone with poorly trimmed nails peeling back my eyelids. My first reaction to someone jabbing my eyes is to shove them away. Same as anyone. I can’t. I’m telling my body to move. I’m screaming at it. I can feel it’s right there and I remember how to move, but it’s not listening to me. And those damn fingers, they won’t stop scratching at my eyes.

“Open your damn eyes, gapper.”

The voice isn’t helping. My eyes aren’t listening. But my throat is worse. Something is blocking my throat and I can’t breathe. I can’t breathe. I can’t breathe and I can’t see and these damn fingers won’t get off my face.

Then suddenly, a bright light.

“Finally. You stubborn prick. Eyes first. Always the eyes first.”

My eyes adjust. It’s my boss. My captain. She doesn’t give me much time to come to terms with my surroundings before she starts yanking at the tube still in my throat. It’s attached to one of the sleeper vats and covered in the same gunk I’m layered in. Everyone is staring at me. It’s not the first time I’ve failed to jump the gap smoothly. Last time I ended up with my own breathing tube tangled around my neck, nobody could figure out how I did it.

I can breathe now.

“On your feet, Siga. You can’t do much if you’re lying around on the floor in your birthday suit.” Helmsman Vanly. He pulled me to my feet, his enormous hands squelching the vat fluids away from my bare skin. Standing beside a man of his stature when you’re both completely nude is certainly a humbling experience. I can sort of feel their presence. Even when I can’t see him, I know he’s there. Feels like warmth. Deeper than that.

My eyes are settling now. I see everyone much clearer than before, but there’s fewer than I remember. Six of us, seven including myself. A mixed crew. It wouldn’t look it if you saw us hosing each other down with water recycled from our own bodily functions, but we’re actually important people. Gappers. Aids to the colonies; that much I remember.  

Titan. We started there. Jumped the gap straight from there back to take another stab at the red planet. Going well so far, from what I hear.

“Siga!” the big helmsman shoves a gushing water hose in front of me.

“You want me to clean you?” I ask.

“Wasn’t it obvious. Just hose down my cheeks, would you? My arms are too big to get in there.”

“Y’know there’s only two kinds of wind in space. Solar wind, and whatever comes out of Vanly’s arsehole.” Security Officer Doweler found her jokes funnier than anyone else. Of course, sometimes she could bring a smile to my face. She’s nearly half the size of Vanly which was always a point of contention between the two but she’d often joke that size doesn’t mean shit when you’re staring down the barrel of a gauss gun.

“Let’s not waste time grab-assing, people,” said the Captain. “We’re here on a mission.”

No idea what mission. Some memories are slower than others. Captain…captain something. She was already fully dressed, even had time to clip those brutal nails.

I’ve always been fond of the deck. It’s the only place with a view. Not like the view is real though, not really. The walls are covered in borderless LED screens projecting cameras from outside. Great for sightseeing, if we ever had time for it.

“Everyone to your stations. Siga, open comms with planetside.”

“Yes sir.” No thinking needed. Even if I was still recovering from the vats, it’s just three buttons. “Comms live, sir.”

“Mars 2, this is the Valkyrie requesting landing guidance, over.” We all wait for their response. Nothing.

“Siga, you forgot to push the open comms button again, didn’t you?” Vanly laughs.

“No! And it’s three buttons, thank you. They probably just weren’t at the comms yet. Try again, sir.”

“Mars 2, this is the Valkyrie requesting landing guidance, over.” The captain looks at me. She knows I haven’t made a mistake; I’m good at my job. We all are. “Mars 2, this is the captain of the Valkyrie, do you read?”

No response again. I look around the room and see people are getting nervous. Even Vanly knows something is off.

“Do you want me to set it down anyway, sir?” he asks.

“Wait a minute. Siga, are you picking up anything at all?”

I look at my panel. All I see is a green cursor blinking on a black screen. “No sir. Not even Mars-to-Earth signals.”

“What about locally? They must have some radio signals from internal comms.”

“There’s nothing, sir. Not even the lander’s beacon.” Everyone looks at the captain. Something has to be off. The lander’s beacon is the very signal that tells everyone, ‘Hey, we’re still here’.

“Siga. Have we received anything from home? If Mars 2 isn’t giving off a lander’s beacon, they must be going nuts.”

“…nothing, sir. Perhaps it’s only just gone off.”

“Are we picking anything up from home?”

I check. There’s nothing. Not a peep. Since the moment we invented radio, the Earth hasn’t been silent. We’ve just been shouting into space, louder and louder. But there’s…

“Nothing, sir.” As I say it, everyone sighs in relief. They all smile at each other and even laugh a little.

“Okay Vanly, set us down in the Mars 2 landing zone.”

“But sir, the signals.”

“Siga, it’s obviously your equipment that’s faulty. There’s no possible way for home to be quiet.”

“That’s true, sir, but the system says nothing is wrong.”

“Then the system is wrong. We’ll set down and Johan will troubleshoot the problem.”

“Yes sir.”

Vanly does as he’s told. We all do. Atmosphere is breached and the ship gets thrown around a little. Nothing unexpected. It’s night time in the colony and the sky is almost cloudless, so we should start seeing some light soon.

Suddenly, everyone starts laughing. Did I miss a joke? It’s hysterical laughter, the kind that sounds eye-bulging. Vanly’s choking on his laughter. He’s crying. How is he going to land like this? And the colony still isn’t visible; there should be lights by now. But everyone is still laughing with wide eyes, staring straight ahead.

As soon as they started, they stop. Their smiles disappear in complete unison like it was rehearsed. They must be messing with me.

“Where are the colony’s lights?” Doweler noticed too, it seems.

“It’s late, planetside. They might have turned off the lights to save power.” Johan is the only one of us to have lived on Mars before. We can probably trust his opinions, right?

“Johan, let’s share a little power with them after landing. The reactor’s got enough to go around.”

“Yes captain.”

Touchdown. The landing is smooth, even without lights showing the way.

Everyone but Vanly and the vat operator suit-up and meet in the airlock. Damn, I can’t remember her name still, the vat operator. Is it Yu? Yao? Begins with a Y and it’s Asian. The last guy unaccounted for is Jones. A Welshman and a quiet one at that. I repeat their names as the crew files into the airlock. Doweler, Johan, Jones, Captain, and me. Wait…what’s my name?

The airlock begins to depressurise.

“Put your damned helmet on, gapper.” Gapper, was that my name? The captain locks my helmet in place. She’s not angry at me. She screams at Johan for activating the airlock before we were ready and would probably have hit him if he wasn’t in a suit too.

The outer door opens. We step out onto Mars. The colony is only a few steps away. It’s all just one story tall and made of some combination of metal and plastic, I don’t really know. It’s not important. But still, the lights are off, they should have turned them on by now. Even if they were all asleep, the sound of a spaceship landing outside your bedroom window is enough to awake anyone.

We reach the colony door. A few buttons and they open. We all stand in the airlock, looking at the door in front of us as the room pressurises. Air gushes past our feet like water in a stream and stops without warning. Everyone removes their helmets and waits for the door again.

“So, what was with that earlier?”

“What was what?” said Doweler.

“Why were you all laughing? Before, when we were landing.”

“What are you on about?”

“You guys were all laughing at nothing before. Was kinda weird.”

“You’re the one being weird. Now’s not the time for your jokes.”

Doweler huffs out the room as the door opens. Jokes? I have a lot of ideas about myself but funny is not one of them. Doweler is the joker. Isn’t she?

“Alright crew, listen up,” began the captain. Everyone encircled her. “We’re going to split into pairs. Keep your flashlights on until we get the lights resto—”

“Sir. There are five of us. How should we split into pairs?”

“No. There’s four of us.”

“No, sir. There’s you, me, Doweler, Jones…” I pause for a moment. Where’s Johan? We’ve just stepped through the door; he can’t have got lost. Oh, that’s right. We left Johan on the ship to repair communications…didn’t we?

“Enough screwing around. Let’s get this done so we can all go home. Jones, you’re with me.” The captain is already gone. I’m paired with Doweler. She’s holding a gun now and has it raised in front of her. Seems a dangerous idea to me, pointing a gun in a residential area, especially in the colony.

The corridors are short and are more like dividers between the dome-shaped rooms, connected one after the other. They creak and moan as the Martian winds throw dust and whatever else against the reinforced walls. The darkness is engulfing. I can see more of my own reflection in my helmet than I see of the room around me.

We get into a routine. At each door, Doweler shines her light on the keypad and I open them. Every room is emptier than the last. We enter maybe a dozen rooms that are starting to look like a waste of space. What are they even using these rooms for? We reach one that doesn’t have furniture, storage, or even light fixtures. It must be under construction, but there’s another room to follow.

We begin our routine again. It feels like I’ve forgotten something important. Even with Doweler by my side, I don’t feel safe anymore. It’s just a colony, why don’t I feel safe? I scan with my keycard. I hear a noise. There’s talking. Distinct, but muffled, there’s someone on the other side of the door. Doweler powers her gun. I frown at her, I mean…we aren’t here to kill anyone. We’re here to help. What does she think is going to happen?

I open the door.

“Captain?”

“You two. What took you so long? Vanly and I have almost got the power running.”

Our conversation is interrupted by a crackle on our radio. It’s Jones.

Captain, the ship is connected to the colony. Power diversion initiating.

I hear a humming…or maybe a buzzing. It’s coming from above me. It’s getting loud. The more I stare at the ceiling the louder it seems to get, but I can’t look away. Why is it so damn loud? My ears, they feel like they’re about to burst! Why won’t it stop buzzing?

Then suddenly, a bright light.

The room turns red. I look behind me and every room we’ve walked through turns red too. Vanly, Doweler, and the captain are all staring at me. What did I miss? Should I say something? They’re staring at me…I must have done something wrong. Please stop staring.

“Gapper, pay attention.” The captain taps on my helmet. It’s quiet, like I’m standing in another room. She hands me something. It’s a metal briefcase without any markings on it.

“Sir, what is…” I’m unsure how I should finish the question. I know what this is for.

“The colonists evacuated into a nearby cave. Logs say a storm damaged vital systems so they’ve retreated into their bunker. We’ve got the parts they need to repair so we’ll bring them back, help them repair, then take off. All on board?”

There are no objections.

We exit out the airlock on the opposite side of the colony and start walking across the Martian surface. It’s still. The dusty floor is barely moving. I follow Vanly, who’s in front of me, and try to fill the footprints he’s making with his long strides.

Now we’re in the cave. I should have been paying attention; I don’t know how we got here. What if I need to get back on my own? I look behind me and it’s dark. More cave? I don’t say anything and just keep moving forward with the others, trying to focus more on my surroundings.

The ground is softer in here, almost wet, but that couldn’t be. The cave is echoing the sound of our heavy boots and my helmet’s audio can’t pinpoint their direction so our hike through this dark tunnel begins to sound like a small army on the march. I’m the first to spot some blue light in the distance. I hurry over, my torch lighting my way past the occasional rock. I get to the light’s source.

“Sir, they’re glowsticks. Colonists must be nearby.”

I pick one up. It’s covered in sand that’s sticking to it, even when I try to brush it off. I plunge my fingers into the ground and see that it’s wet, there’s no mistake about it. They must have spilt something in their rush down here. Wait…what’s this marking by the glowsticks, in the wall? It’s like a Y but if it had a head in the middle. And beside the marking is another, the same but upside down. They’re etched into the wall.

“Captain, come look at this.” He’s standing behind me already. He takes a knee and inspects the symbols by running his large hands across them.

“It’s nothing. Just some kid’s drawings.”

We walk on. The further we walk, the wetter the ground becomes until it’s like we’re walking on a beach just after the tide has gone out. We’re deep in the tunnel now, and the air is cool, almost refreshing. I feel a droplet of water fall onto my nose. Wait…why am I not wearing my helmet?! I’m going to suffocate! I can’t find my helmet, where’s it gone? I don’t want to die…I’m not going to. I can breathe. I take a deep breath and it smells like the ocean. I can even taste the salt.

“Keep moving, kid.” Captain Vanly shoves me, playfully, I suppose. I take fives steps before I’m stopped by the sound of a metal chime underneath my foot. The gritty grind of the sand against the metal goes right through me. I look down. It’s a sword. Not some old artifact either. A shimmering, unblemished sword. I pick it up. I look at my reflection in the blade but it’s hard to hold horizontally.

“Take it with you, Gapper. We can’t leave it there.” Doweler is still holding her gauss gun. She’s staring at me now. Even with the blue glow from the floor and my own flashlight, I can barely see her face behind her hair. Her only feature I can really see is a swirl of golden light reflecting in her eyes. I feel a warmth behind me.

“It’s time to go, Gapper.” Captain Vanly. He gently places his hand on my shoulder and leads me further into the dripping tunnel.

We reach a cavern filled with more blue light and the crackle of fire in the distance…and whispers. Kind whispers, scared ones too. Whispers evolving into roars. There’s laughter and singing and yelling and screaming and I can’t see the source of any of it. In its place, at the centre of the cavern, is a ship. Not like the Valkyrie, but an old one. Ancient. Half of the ship is in complete tatters, with most of the hull missing or rotten to the core. The other half is perfect. As fresh as the day it was made.

“How is this here?” I ask. Vanly and Doweler don’t answer but they also don’t seem surprised. They’re just staring at me. “Guys, this is freaking me out. Let’s go back to the ship. Let’s go home.” 

“You’re where you need to be, Gapper.”

I taste metal. Skin tightens. Hair stands. My teeth become sensitive and feel brittle. The sword in my hand is heavier now and hurts to hold. I try to throw it away but it barely even falls to the floor. It’s cold. The chill bites at my bare body and pulls at my spotting skin and whispers into my quieting ears and steals the salty taste from my tongue.

Then suddenly, a bright light.